Readers exposed: Neil Hayes

Readers exposed Back Chat feature
Neil Hayes

This is your chance to get your mug in the mag; share your adventure stories and tell us all about your two-wheeled dream machine

Name: Neil Hayes (aka Nobby) Age: 44 Occupation: Unpopular

First bike

Suzuki TS 125; Honda CG 125 (yes, really!)

Current bike

2003 Multistrada 1000 DS

Dream bike

Yamaha TDR 250 in black and yellow, fully restored.

Ferry or tunnel?

Ferry. I live too far away from the tunnel.

Most expensive motorcycle accessory ever bought

I once bought a £600 metal shed to keep a couple of bikes in, does that count?

Lifelong ambition

To finish work in the next six years and have enough money to be able to go travelling by bike.

Ideal travel partner

My long-suffering wife of 20-plus years; I’ve got her riding a bike eventually.

Most dangerous moment

On my first trip abroad on a bike, I forgot which side to overtake on. I undertook an articulated lorry and came very close to being wiped out by the 40-tonner.

Most memorable moment

Getting to the top of the Stelvio two-up after doing all the navigation myself for the first time.

What do you miss most when travelling?

Nothing really, it’s all about trying new things and new situations. It’s no fun staying within your comfort zone.

The person you would most like to meet and the question you would most like to ask them

After visiting Auschwitz, it would be Hitler, and ‘why?’ would be my question.

Favourite crap joke

Two blondes are driving towards Vegas for a holiday when they see a road sign saying ‘Vegas left ’. They both start crying and drive home.

Write a 50-word personal ad for you and your bike as if you were both going to join an adventure bike riding dating site

Battered, 40-something carrying a bit extra seeks open-minded goodtime girl with excellent communication skills for rough and tumble adventures with flighty red Italian. Must expect tantrums, breakdowns and be able to get their own round in. If you’re high maintenance, do not apply. Come and see the world by bike!

Want to be featured?

If you want to be a reader exposed in a future issue of Adventure Bike Rider, email [email protected] and we’ll give you a free one-year subscription. You can’t say fairer than that, eh?