Groan

[SHarper]

“THE END OF THE WORLD IS NIGH!” shouted the man on the tractor as he went down the lane.

I think it was Farmer Geddon.

[bill_qaz]

Doctor can you help me. I woke up Monday feeling like a marquee, then on Wednesday I felt like a teepee .
Doctor says I will give you something to relax you as you are too tense

[Flipflop]

A penguin is riding his bike one day when he notices it's leaking oil all over the road. Fortunately, it happened near a bike shop. He dropped it off at the shop, and the mechanic said it should take a few hours.

The penguin decided to go for lunch. He stopped at a diner and ordered a tuna sandwich, with extra mayo.

After a few hours he wandered back to the shop. He went inside and approached the mechanic who said- Well, it looks like you blew a seal.

The penguin stopped, thought for a minute, wiped his beak with his wing and said- Oh no, that's just mayonnaise.

[dave h]

my wife told me i had to get out of the house for doing bad impressions of the terminator,

i'm not worried i'll be returning.

[daveuprite]

I just found out that I'm colour blind.

The news came completely out of the green.

[OnHellas]

Why did the orange stop rolling?

It ran out of juice.


That was the first joke that I heard and remembered.

[OnHellas]

What does Mr Kipling do at night?

Fills his tarts with cream!

[daveuprite]

What does Mr Kipling do at night?

Fills his tarts with cream!

Fnaa fnaa. Sidney James would have been proud of that one

[daveuprite]

Prince Charles is in isolation at Balmoral with Covid 19

Prince Andrew is in isolation at Windsor with Jennifer, 14

[Monster]

My friend loves trivia and thinks that he is very clever

You can just hear him ... Did you know that the onion is the only food that can make you cry

So I threw a coconut at his face to prove him wrong