Shoplifting wife

Anything goes, and mine's a Guinness.
Post Reply
Jelly
Posts: 2636
Joined: Sun May 22, 2011 4:42 pm

Shoplifting wife

Post by Jelly » Wed Aug 24, 2011 4:44 pm

A Woman appeared before the Court for stealing a tin of peaches.
The Magistrate asked her, "How many peaches were in the tin?"
"Four your honour" she said.
"Well, I'm going to sentence you to one month in jail for every peach you stole, he said."
With that, her Husband called out from the gallery, "She also stole a tin of peas".
:laugh:
"The distant echo of faraway voices boarding far away trains,



To take them home to the ones that they love and who love them forever......."

Adventure Bike Rider New Issue Out Now
moto al
Posts: 10887
Joined: Thu Dec 09, 2010 8:24 pm
Been thanked: 2 times

Re: Shoplifting wife

Post by moto al » Thu Aug 25, 2011 7:01 am

good one he he,al
moto al

The Wilbur
Posts: 933
Joined: Tue May 03, 2011 10:00 am

Re: Shoplifting wife

Post by The Wilbur » Thu Aug 25, 2011 11:37 am

Two elephants went to the beach, but only one went for a swim.

Why?

Because they only had one pair of trunks. :P
SUCK : SQUEEZE : BANG : BLOW



www.f650.co.uk

mark1150
Posts: 3892
Joined: Sat Oct 16, 2010 2:44 pm

Re: Shoplifting wife

Post by mark1150 » Thu Aug 25, 2011 3:17 pm

A horse walks into a bar; barman says "why the long face?"
Englishman, Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar; barman says "Is this some sort of a joke?"
The end of the road is the start of the fun



A bad day on the bike is still better than a good day at the office

DRZ 400

XR 400 R

Jelly
Posts: 2636
Joined: Sun May 22, 2011 4:42 pm

Re: Shoplifting wife

Post by Jelly » Thu Aug 25, 2011 4:02 pm

Crystal ball for sale, £40

but you will knock me down to £35.


:laugh:
"The distant echo of faraway voices boarding far away trains,



To take them home to the ones that they love and who love them forever......."

mark1150
Posts: 3892
Joined: Sat Oct 16, 2010 2:44 pm

Re: Shoplifting wife

Post by mark1150 » Thu Aug 25, 2011 4:09 pm

Jelly wrote:Crystal ball for sale, £40

but you will knock me down to £35.


:laugh:
Funny, I saw that one coming :dry:


I had a crystal ball once, played havoc with the way I walked. :lol:
The end of the road is the start of the fun



A bad day on the bike is still better than a good day at the office

DRZ 400

XR 400 R

herman
Posts: 5359
Joined: Mon Jul 19, 2010 7:51 pm
Has thanked: 878 times
Been thanked: 628 times

Re: Shoplifting wife

Post by herman » Thu Aug 25, 2011 4:16 pm

I used to be a practicing clairvoyant but I gave it up....I just could'nt see a future in it. :whistle:
The secret of a long life is knowing when its time to go.

Morph
Posts: 1514
Joined: Mon May 09, 2011 7:28 pm
Location: Stourbridge
Has thanked: 205 times
Been thanked: 92 times

Re: Shoplifting wife

Post by Morph » Thu Aug 25, 2011 4:42 pm

I had a curried pelican at the local indian. Not bad, but the bill was enormous!

I then chose the Balti Tarka - its a bit like a balti Tikka but a little otter!
The lightest piece of kit is the one you leave behind...

dave_ac
Posts: 382
Joined: Sun Jun 26, 2011 8:08 am

Re: Shoplifting wife

Post by dave_ac » Thu Aug 25, 2011 4:56 pm

A huge white stallion walk into a bar and asked the bar man, 'i'll have a whiskey please'

The bar man replied, 'Hey we have a whiskey named after you'

The white stallion said, 'What Eric?'

mark1150
Posts: 3892
Joined: Sat Oct 16, 2010 2:44 pm

Re: Shoplifting wife

Post by mark1150 » Thu Aug 25, 2011 5:06 pm

I was going to tell my car park joke; but it's wrong on every level.


BTW, I think there ought to be a humour / joke category.
The end of the road is the start of the fun



A bad day on the bike is still better than a good day at the office

DRZ 400

XR 400 R

Post Reply

Return to “THE PUB”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Bing [Bot] and 112 guests