Groan

Anything goes, and mine's a Guinness.
bill_qaz
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Re: Groan

Post by bill_qaz » Tue Mar 17, 2020 4:55 pm

gbags wrote:
Tue Mar 17, 2020 4:29 pm
What do you call a man wearing brown, paper trousers?

Russell.
His wife had a tile for a hat, her name was roof

Adventure Bike Rider New Issue Out Now
AdventureDisco
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Re: Groan

Post by AdventureDisco » Tue Mar 17, 2020 5:38 pm

Agoraphobia group meeting cancelled due to self isolation! ;)

daveuprite
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Re: Groan

Post by daveuprite » Tue Mar 17, 2020 5:48 pm

AdventureDisco wrote:
Tue Mar 17, 2020 5:38 pm
Agoraphobia group meeting cancelled due to self isolation! ;)
Clairvoyants meeting cancelled due to unforeseen events.

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Monster
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Re: Groan

Post by Monster » Tue Mar 17, 2020 11:07 pm

What is better than roses on a piano?

Two Lips on an organ
If a Hammer don't fix it - you have an electrical problem

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Re: Groan

Post by daveuprite » Wed Mar 18, 2020 7:53 am

What's the best time to go the dentist?

2.30

daveuprite
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Re: Groan

Post by daveuprite » Wed Mar 18, 2020 9:25 am

What's the favourite drink of fat adolescents?

Ovalteen

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Monster
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Re: Groan

Post by Monster » Wed Mar 18, 2020 11:05 am

What do you call a ......

Man with a seagull on his head .... Cliff
Man with a spade in his head .... Doug
And a man with no spade in his hands ... Douglas
Man in a grinder ... Chuck
Man under your car ... Jack
Man in a hole ... Phil
Man with no legs ... Neal
Woman with 1 leg longer than the other ... Eileen
Same but Japanese woman ... Irene
Man with a rabbit up his .... Warren
Man who died and was buried a long time ago ... Pete
Man with no arms or legs but still swimming ... Bob
Same guy rings your doorbell ... Matt
Same guy on the wall ... Art
Same guy in the sink ... Duane
Again but in a pot ... Stu
Again but near the mailbox ... Bill
Again but in a bun ... Frank
Again but on a podium ... Mike
Again but in a pile of leaves ... Russell
Again but up a tree ... Bud
A woman with no arms or legs in a frying pan ... Patty
Same but swimming ... Flo
Same but on the fence ... Barb
Same but on the beach ... Sandy

I do hope that I can get out soon !!
If a Hammer don't fix it - you have an electrical problem

Mickdb1
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Re: Groan

Post by Mickdb1 » Wed Mar 18, 2020 7:17 pm

Be careful if using the Sun to wipe one's bum as it's already full of shit!!!.

Copied from another forum

In February 2040 John opened his last packet of toilet rolls he inherited from his parents
You dont pack up biking when you grow old

You grow old when you pack up biking

dave h
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Re: Groan

Post by dave h » Wed Mar 18, 2020 9:15 pm

whats the rarest owl in britain,

teat.

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Re: Groan

Post by daveuprite » Thu Mar 19, 2020 6:27 am

Scott_rider wrote:
Mon Mar 16, 2020 6:28 pm
Patient....Doctor, doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains...

Doctor...Pull yourself together Man...
Not sure, but I think that could be the first joke I ever remember hearing! So that makes it at least about 50 years old.... :D

This might have been the second joke I ever heard:

When is a door not a door? When it's a jar.

GROAN

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