Nob Of The Year

daveuprite · Post by **daveuprite** » Sat Jun 16, 2018 9:42 am

OK, so we're only half way through, but for the '2018 Nob Of The Year Award' I would like to nominate:

Myself.

Because I just strimmed a turd. I strimmed right through a large dog turd and flung high speed dog-shit all over myself.

Any other nominations?

zimtim · Post by **zimtim** » Sat Jun 16, 2018 9:50 am

Nope you win.
I hereby pronounce you the ABR Nob of the year.
The supreme bellend.
That is of course providing you can verify this momentous act with photographic proof

daveuprite · Post by **daveuprite** » Sat Jun 16, 2018 9:53 am

zimtim wrote: ↑Sat Jun 16, 2018 9:50 am Nope you win.
I hereby pronounce you the ABR Nob of the year.
The supreme bellend.
That is of course providing you can verify this momentous act with photographic proof

Sorry Zim, got to disappoint you. It will have to remain anecdotal. But the smell has an air of authenticity about it...

zimtim · Post by **zimtim** » Sat Jun 16, 2018 9:58 am

As an aside make sure you wash yourself properly especially round eyes, mouth and nose. This happened to a local gardener, who just wiped his face and carried on with the job.
Ended up in hospital with a serious viral infection.
Affected his lungs and some kind of worm in his eye.

diggermanbob · Post by **diggermanbob** » Sat Jun 16, 2018 9:58 am

Tim has seconded that and I will turd it you are nob of the year

daveuprite · Post by **daveuprite** » Sat Jun 16, 2018 10:07 am

diggermanbob wrote: ↑Sat Jun 16, 2018 9:58 am Tim has seconded that and I will turd it you are nob of the year

Well thanks folks. I didn't realise that I would stand unopposed. I'd like to thank the academy, my parents for having me, and of course Stihl Ltd. for equipping me to win this prestigious accolade.

Tonibe63 · Post by **Tonibe63** » Sat Jun 16, 2018 10:18 am

You forgot to thank a leading figure in this production ..................................... The dog

Brenhden · Post by **Brenhden** » Sat Jun 16, 2018 10:33 am

A friend of my used be in a team of contract gardeners who did schools and parks and stuff.

Each day they would all put a quid in a jar and at the end of the shift would give the jar to the guy most covered in strimmed dog shit.

Every cloud has a silver lining...

diggermanbob · Post by **diggermanbob** » Sat Jun 16, 2018 11:25 am

This really is a crap thread

daveuprite · Post by **daveuprite** » Sat Jun 16, 2018 12:03 pm

Tonibe63 wrote: ↑Sat Jun 16, 2018 10:18 am You forgot to thank a leading figure in this production ..................................... The dog

Quite right Toni - very remiss of me. A big hand for the Producer, Max:

You get a pretty decent sized turd from a 42kg labrador.

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