The Yorkshire Farmer.

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nickoff
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The Yorkshire Farmer.

Post by nickoff » Sat Jan 28, 2017 1:47 pm

Following the death of his wife, a thrifty Yorkshire farmer visited the offices of the Yorkshire Post. After 50 years of happily married life he felt that an obituary would be in order.

When the receptionist informed the farmer of the cost, he exclaimed in true Yorkshire fashion.

“How Much? I want summat simple. My Gladys was a good-hearted and hard-working Yorkshire lass but she wunt ‘ave wanted nowt swanky.”

"Perhaps a small poem?” suggested the woman at the desk.

“Nay,” said the farmer. “She wunt ‘ave wanted anything la-di-da. Just put; ‘Gladys Braithwaite’s died.’”

"You need to say when,” he was told by the receptionist.

“Do I? Well, put there: Died 17th March 2015. That’ll do.”

“It is usual for the bereaved to add some meaningful phrase about the dearly departed.”

The farmer considered this proposal for a moment. “Well, put in, ‘Sadly missed.’ That’ll do.’

“You can have another four words,” explained. the woman.

“No, no!” he cried, “she wouldn’t ‘ave wanted me to splash out.”

“But the extra four words are included in the price,” the woman told him.

“Are they? You mean I’ve paid for ‘em?”

“Yes, indeed.”

“Well, if I’ve paid for ‘em,” exclaimed the man, “then I’m ‘avin’ ‘em.”

The following obituary appeared in the Yorkshire Post the next morning.

Gladys Braithwaite died
17th March 2016
Sadly missed
Also Tractor for sale. 


Nick.

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MotoCP
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Re: The Yorkshire Farmer.

Post by MotoCP » Sat Jan 28, 2017 2:46 pm

Ha ha....there's nowt wrong with that ;)

placky2
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Re: The Yorkshire Farmer.

Post by placky2 » Sat Jan 28, 2017 4:31 pm

as a fellow yorkie that's so true and I love it
bosses are like nappys,always hanging round ya arse and full of shit.



life is like a shit sandwich,the more bread you have the less shit you eat.



never get into owt you cant get out of.

Earwig
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Re: The Yorkshire Farmer.

Post by Earwig » Sat Jan 28, 2017 5:28 pm

Once told by a Yorkshire farmer that definition of a Yorkshire man is that he's just like a Scotsman, but with the generosity taken out :pinch:

placky2
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Re: The Yorkshire Farmer.

Post by placky2 » Sat Jan 28, 2017 6:03 pm

that's how copper wire was invented,a Scotsman and a yorksire man fighting over a penny................. :whistle: :laugh:
bosses are like nappys,always hanging round ya arse and full of shit.



life is like a shit sandwich,the more bread you have the less shit you eat.



never get into owt you cant get out of.

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92kk k100lt 193214
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Re: The Yorkshire Farmer.

Post by 92kk k100lt 193214 » Sat Jan 28, 2017 6:43 pm

That's nasty. Almost as bad as what the poor Harley riders have to put up with.
1992 K100LT since June 2010 110,000 miles
1984 K100RT since July 2013 36,000 miles now going on 90,000 miles.
1997 K1100LT SE since Oct 2017 59,000 miles now 103,500 miles
1983 K100RS 29,000 since 2019 miles now 36,400 miles and parked in Spain.

sid.
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Re: The Yorkshire Farmer.

Post by sid. » Sun Jan 29, 2017 5:48 pm

You can tell a Yorkshire man, but you can't tell him much.

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